Deep within the minds of monster's all over the city of Tokyo, a switch is flipped. A sudden shock-wave rolls over the streets and roaring howl echoes into the sky. The giant soup creature, The Ra-Man, holds his head in pain, shaking back in forth. Then, almost in retaliation, he strikes a nearby building, smashing it to the ground.
“That's right, my child, go crazy! Go crazy and crush this city under your feet!” The evil doctor genius, Dr. Red, shouts from his mysterious laboratory. He watches the city from monitors surrounding his headquarters. “You may have just been a meal for someone else in your home dimension, but, in this one, you are the one that will feast on Tokyo! Now, The Ra-Man, take out your anger and your migraine on the city!”
The soup monster shrieks, tears a pair of surrounding towers off the street and hurls them into a developmental block, causing an enormous explosion and gust of smoke.
“That's right, you are under my control now!!!” Dr. Red cackles, as the inter-dimensional soup creature's eyes turn to a glowing red. “Ra-Man, my son, those flames look great, but they are not nearly as high as your Papa wants! Add more wood!”
Ra-Man moves in towards a couple more buildings to add to the inferno, but, suddenly, a defender soars in from the sky and hits the streets behind the flames.
“What the hell is this?” yells the evil doctor. “Ra-Man, go and investigate! I don't need some hero spoiling my plans before they get started!”
Ra-Man takes his attention from the buildings, and approaches the fiery wall.
“What are you waiting for? Get closer?”
Ra-Man advances slowly, showing some obvious reluctance in cooking his chicken noodle innards within his aluminum exoskeleton. Then, the figure emerges, walking through the flame. Its mouth is full of teeth. It's head is carrying a pair of giant horns... and the fire comes with it.
“Who the hell?” screams the doctor. “I don't have a report on him! Ra-Man, smash this nobody!”
Ra-Man charges in with a wide hay-maker locked and loaded, but it loses steam as the fires of the burning city draw in. The fist connects, but Ra-Man quickly draws his punch, knowing it hardly had enough power to take down a concrete wall, let alone a giant beast's skull.
“I knew I would be facing you soon,” the advancing figure says. “I had a vision of you. I knew you couldn't be trusted, but, to be honest, I envisioned you bigger...”
“He talks?!?!” the crazed doctor shouts. “And here I thought my monsters were crazy! Maybe inter-dimensional travel doesn't fry braincells. Maybe it's just Japanese food!”
The red glowing eyes of Ra-Man fills with rage, and he bolts in for a second attack, but, this time, he is not given a free strike. The figure, a giant blue dragon, spins around and crushes the soup monster with his enormous tail. The Insta-Nightmare flies into a building, dropping the higher floors on top of his head.
“Get up!” the dragon orders.
“Ge- Hey, I was going to say that!” Dr. Red screams. “Stop taking the words out of my mouth!”
The evil soup monstrosity removes the shattered building remains off his round exterior, and comes to his feet. He strikes a battle pose.
“Before you try that, soup man,” the dragon warns. “I noticed you didn't like the heat of my flames. Why don't you cut this destructive nonsense out, before you really get my temper boiling.”
The Ra-Man seems to be in genuine agreement, nods, and turns away. He begins to walk away, but a gust gust of evil energy takes control of him. His deep red eyes explode in hate.
“How dare you!” the doctor scolds, pressing buttons and pull unlabeled levers. “I will show you what disobedience will get you!”
Ra-Man charges through the wreckage forward, but the blue dragon is there in full strength to end his tantrum. He clobbers him with the side of his horns and drops him a pair of ill-intended kicks. Ra-Man flops about, in pain, and rolls around on the ground like a helpless empty can.
“I hope you've learned a lesson, Soup,” the dragon says. “Because if I see you around Tokyo, causing a scene again, I'll split you open from expiration date to nutritional facts...”
“You stupid, stupid, can of crap!” Red yells. “Get up! Get up! Get up... … ”
Winner – Fred via fiery beatdown
“So this is the mech,” Pink Ranger introduces. The boys drool over they're newest female member to their team. “I'll show you were you'll be stationed.”
Green follows Pink to the giant Loser Mech, leaving the lovestruck Red, Blue, Purple, and Yellow.
“You guys coming?” Green asks, turning around. They gulp, nod, and stumble along, trying their best to act natural.
“You'd think they haven't worked with a girl before,” Pink chimes in.
“Sorry, Pink,” Yellow replies. “There are no such thing as a pink M&M.”
“I'm sure that's not all that bad of a thing,” Pink snaps back. “Plus, what the hell does that have to do with anything?”
“Enough team,” Green interrupts, causing leader Red's heat to miss a beat. “Our target is closing in on us. We need to go to work.”
The team rushes to their spots, maybe only because Green ordered them to, but they are their quickly, nevertheless.
“Good work, Green,” Red happens to say past the drool. “There's Mebbles on the radar alright.”
The Loser Mech starts to move, and, within no time, they come to his blip on the screen.
“What the...” they wonder. “An igloo?”
Along side a busy highway system is a large frozen shelter, with what seems to be only one opening. The rangers approach it and kneel down by the entrance.
“Ummm, Mr. Mebbles?” Yellow asks. “You missed your court date this afternoon... probably because your a giant monster and all... monsters probably miss that sort of stuff...”
“We need to speak with you, Mebbles,” the more stern leader Red butts in. “As weird as it sounds, if you are going to stay in Japan, and not make a mess, you have to follow our laws. You have some unpaid speeding tickets that we need to settle up with money or community service.”
Suddenly, someone comes to the door.
“No... No... Mr. Mebbles not home...”
“But we just want to speak with-”
“No... No... he no home...”
“We're not selling any-”
“No... No... you go now...”
“Oh, enough of this!” Green shouts, firing a missile into the maid and the front door.
A good half of the ice shack exploded, revealing Mebbles soaking in a tub on the second floor.
“No, no, no, no, no, no!” Mebbles cries as his tub rolls closer and closer to the edge of his broken floor. “No!”
It was to no use, as the mini-dragon falls flat on his butt on the ground.
“Ummm, sorry, to make such a big fuss, Mr. Mebbles,” Pink states. “But we really do need to speak with you for a moment about these fines...”
“Fines? Fines!” Mebbles shouts back. “You guys just blew up half of my house! Who's going to pay for it to be fixed? You guys?”
“Well, no...” the rangers respond, all at a loss of words.
“Well, it looks like we do have a court case now!” Mebbles huffs. “And you'll be hearing from my lawyer!”
Winner – Mebble via Counter Lawsuit
“Okay, my sweet, merciful, pterodactyl,” Dr. Red orders from deep within his undisclosed base. “Go and wreck havoc!”
“!@#$ you,” he shrieks back. “Err... Sorry! Habit! I mean, no problem, boss!”
SMF flies in there, streamline, to a conflict already in progress.
“Looks like those two silly tree-lovers, Udyr and Ekhornkin, are fighting over an acorn or something,” laughs the evil doctor. “How pitiful! Well, they aren't responding to my mind-control shock-waves, so I have no need for them in my new world. SMF, kill them all!”
“!@#$ yeah!” Pterodactyl replies, with his eyes sparking bright blood red.
“I see you, black drake,” a mysterious figure mutter, hiding behind a building. “Encounter level 5: I should get good experience points from that...”
As the winged beast flies by, Mantaur the enormous gaming geek, pops out of his hiding spot and tackles the dinosaur.
“Attack of Opportunity!” the nerd shouts, as the pair tumble down the street. “Plus two to my next attack!”
“What in the heaven's is that idiot rambling about?” Dr. Red asks.
“No !@#$'ing idea, boss!”
“Well, put this dweeb back into his mom's basement and continue on our mission!”
Mantaur and SMF tumble down the street, trying to fight for an early dominate position, but the struggle sends them like a giant monster-filled bowling ball into the already battling squirrel and shaman. The four warriors smash into each other and break a part. Soon, they all stand and make it a free-for-all.
“Oh, great!” the evil scientist adds. “Now I got to worry about this too? Whatever, SMF, waste them all!”
SMF darts in and connects against Udyr's face, while Ekhornkin drops a heavy head butt against the skull of Mantaur.
“Ow, loss of 3 hit points!” the nerd yells, taking track. “Well, I have Initiative next...”
Mantaur swings, misses, notices his shoes are untied, trips, falls down, and punches himself in the chin, all in one clean but awkward motion.
“Ugh, Epic Fall!” he groans. “I must have rolled a 1! This probably means I miss my next turn, right?”
The squirrel shrugs, because, we'll, he ain't no nerd. He's a squirrel.
“Mind checking the rulebook for me?” asks Mantaur.
Ekhornkin refuses, shaking his head, and begins to lay down some mean stomps to the body of Mantaur.
“Ow, ow, ow, ow!” he yelps, counting damage on his fingers. “Okay, okay! I'm knocked out! Cut it out!”
Ekhornkin pauses, wondering if Mantaur is really serious about removing himself so willingly from the battle.
“I guess I'm going to check out the rules on that one,” Mantaur scoffs. “Seeing how someone, who will remain nameless, I'm looking at you though, is a jerk!” He then crawls along the street and starts flipping through a giant tomb of rules and regulations, none of which may pertain to this battle.
Ekhornkin looks over to see SMF Pterodactyl hovering over a incapacitated Udyr.
“There's just the squirrel left, my boy!” Dr. Red orders. “Go for the kill!”
SMF flies in, but misses. He swoops around and dive bombs again. This time, Ekhornkin punches a lightning bolt into his face and sends him staggering to the ground.
“No more !#@$'ing game, squirrel,” SMF taunts. “Time for you to hibernate... for forever!”
SMF readies up for another fly-by, but, then, out of nowhere Mantaur is back into the fight.
“Sneak Attack!” he declares, jumping on the winged-beast and back-suplexing him unconscious on the frozen ground below.
Ekhornkin looks on, confused, but readies for the next battle.
“Sweet, I leveled up!” Mantaur cheers. “Or I think I did... Oh, well, I'll party with you later, squirrel-man! You beat me fair and square, so you get all the treasure. GG!”
Winner - Ekhornkin by default.
“Ohhh, you like that too?” Thorn says, wrestling under the sheets with an unnamed woman. “Me too!”
Suddenly, it all fades to black: the woman, the sheets, the bed, everything. Brain Thorn floats in a space of pure black nothingness. A chill goes up his spine.
“Brian Thorn,” an fearful voice beckons from the veil of mystery. “Look at you, little boy, just pathetic...”
“Pathetic?” Thorn snaps back, trying to find the source in which to argue with. “I am Brian Thorn! I am the protector and hero of Tokyo, Japan, and damn good at it too!”
“Are you?” the demonic wind questions. “Nothing has changed. The world is still falling apart...”
“Well,” Thorn replies. “I am just one man. I could be virtually perfect and...”
“That's right, you are,” the voice confirms. “Just one man, and, no matter how good you think you are, you cannot stop this city from crumbling and dying. Men have their limits, even great men. Even Reagan couldn't escape the natural limits of old age...”
“Reagan?” Thorn questions. “What's that got to do with anything?”
“Nothing to you, Thorn,” the voice continues. “Not that you have ever cared who you shared a bed with.”
Suddenly a body appears below Tokyo's hero, but this time it takes the form of former-president, Ronald Reagan. Brian Thorn immediately pops up, in shock, and clenches his fists.
“Okay, no more games!” Thorn demands. “Let's settle this one on one, man versus... whatever you are!”
“You'd like that, wouldn't you?” the panic-inducing blackness taunts. “Although I fail to see how a fight will solve anything. I am merely a figment of your imagination within a dream. I am not real.”
“You're what?” Brian asks, watching the Reagan body dissipate into nothingness.
“I am your sub-conscience when you are filled with fear, guilt, and regret,” the voice explains.
“But... I'm not filled with those things.” he quickly replies.
“Then, why have you summoned me?” the voice asks. “I am not something without a purpose. Without a purpose, you would be speaking with nothing. You'd be by yourself. By my presence alone, means you have enough guilt and fear to bring me here.”
“But... that's imposs-”
“You only think it's impossible,” the darkness interrupts. “But if you look deep within yourself, you will find that I am correct. If you look deep enough, you'll find Brian Thorn acts and does what he does to counterbalance the fear, guilt, and despair that coils within your soul.”
“You know what?!” Thorn speaks up. “I don't like this dream anymore. I am waking up!”
“What's got you so bothered, Brian? You're own reflection?”
“Hardly!” Thorn spouts back. “I've just had enough of your nonsense. I have real matters to attend to, and there are millions of people that need me to be strong for them!”
“Silly, man,” the voice condescends. “The people have already lost – you have already lost. The people of Tokyo have go underground. You don't have anything to be strong for except a bunch of real estate – empty buildings. The bright-lit city of Tokyo is a ghost town when the monsters showed up, and the great metal warrior, Brian Thorn, didn't stop that for even a second...”
“But, I've completed every mission...”
“What missions?” the voice continues. “The missions your military leaders give you? You think their misguidance is your pardon? Those hard-headed idiots thought the monsters were the problem that invaded Japan, and sent in their iron-clad knight to thwart the evil doers, but the real problem was under your noses the whole time.”
“What?” Thorn asks. “What's the real...”
“Man,” the voice quickly answers. “It's the human race. It's always been the human race. Ever since apes walked upright and started fires, they have been looking for a way to obliterate themselves. War. Greed. Pollution. Man has tried many different ways to make sure they don't see a tomorrow. Maybe monsters are just a different method...”
“Man?”
“That's right,” the voice continues. “You humans think you are fighting to survive, but, in reality, you are fighting to die with a clear conscience. Look inside yourself, you know it to be true. Why do you pilot that robot? Are you really obligated because you are a good person or because there is admiration to be had? Any pathetic man would rather die loved than hated and disregarded...”
“That's not it!” Thorn yells back. “I have the skills and strength to save this city, and the people...”
“I told you... there are no people to save... not anymore.”
“Fine, whatever you say,” Thorn says. “But I am waking up and doing something, and we'll see who's right tomorrow night. I'll be back to tell you how well I did.”
“Be afraid, Thorn,” the voice threatens. “Be very afraid...”
“Me? Forget about it!” Thorn shouts, as he shakes himself awake.
… …. ….
… …. ….
… …. ….
… …. ….
… …. ….
Thorn wakes up from his nightmare. It's still night, very dark. He tries to look over to his clock to see what time it is, but his eyes have not adjusted. He wipes them, and tries again.
“You left before I could tell you, Thorn” a giant demon cackles floating above his bed. “Be afraid! Be very afraid of... Fearzilla!!!”
Winner – Everyone, but Thorn and Fearzilla. Sorry, guys! You guys had the best role-plays this go-around, but I couldn't pick a winner or let your two characters settle things right away.
