Post by Nyarlath on Oct 29, 2010 18:35:12 GMT -5
...and the crowd is on it's feet!
That is rare to see here in Japan.
Komoto Bobo is climbing the top rope, but no! Here comes Thorn, who blasts to the top and sends Komoto crashing down with a top rope huricanrana.
Can you believe the athleticism? Brian Thorn jumped from the canvas straight up to Komoto Bobo's shoulders, and Bobo was standing atop the turnbuckle!
Brian Thorn is an amazing athlete but he too took some damage from that move. These fans are going crazy for a match that has to be an instant classic.
"Instant classic? The announcers said that?"
"Shut up or you'll ruin the story."
Both men slow to their feet, Thorn is up first and charges at Bobo with a clothesline. No! Bobo ducks and counters with a backslide! Kickout, and now Thorn has Bobo in a pin! Kickout! Back and forth, how many near falls are we going to see?
This is just a testament to both men's conditioning. This match has been going on for three hours and thirty seven minutes, fatigue set in long ago, and now they're still able to kick out of all of these pin attempts.
We'll have to see who is able to last longer in this predicament.
Komoto Bobo is younger but Brian Thorn has legendary endurance.
"Three and a half hours?"
"What did I tell you about ruining the story?"
"Just seems a bit ridiculous..."
We've seen it all folks, from arm locks to scoop slams, from spinning toe holds to powerbombs, and from snapmares to acrobatic maneuvers from the top rope. Now, after all this time, can either of these men find a way to finish the other off?
They must have reversed each others pin attempts for a solid five minutes there. Technical mastery. I didn't even know that many variations on a pin existed! And how clever of Thorn to break that last attempt with a thumb to the eye?
The crowd is going nuts! I've never seen this many people in attendance, unless you count meetings at small countries, and they're all on their feet screaming at Brian Thorn with unbridled hatred. And now he's mocking them!
Nearly four hours of wrestling and he's still got the presence of mind to piss the crowd off. He truly is the best professional wrestler ever. Period.
But he wasted time! Komoto recovered and is signaling to the fans, who are cheering so loudly we just suffered and earth quake.
No joke, where's the Richter Scale?
Brian Thorn just realized what's going on and turns around, kick to the gut! Komoto is signaling for his finisher, the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam! NO!!!
Holy Crap!
Somehow Thorn managed to reverse the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam!!! Nobody has ever countered the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam!
What's he doing now??
DEAR GOD ALMIGHTY!!! Brian Thorn just nailed Komoto Bobo with a SUPER-Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam from the Top Rope!!! Garbage is piling in the ring as Thorn goes for the cover!
1...
2...
3!!!
Holy bajeebus! These fans are going nuts! Typically fans in Japanese wrestling aren't as vocal or physical, but they REALLY hate Brian Thorn for countering the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam into a Super-Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam from the Top Rope!
The greatest wrestler to ever exist.
Security has to escort him to the back, look at the pile of trash in the ring. Seriously we're going to need a few dump trucks here.
"I'm supposed to believe that seriously happened?"
"Sure did, and then when I got to the back I stopped pretending I was winded. One of the best matches I've ever been involved in."
"Wow, that's truly amazing, but you know full well this isn't the story I was hoping to hear."
"So you can't believe the story about the wrestling match but you can believe the one about the monster in Tokyo?"
"Think about it, if there's going to be a random monster attack it's going to be in Tokyo. Besides, I got the recap of your match from the internet. It went for thirty two minutes and you lost after taking a piledriver."
"Two piledrivers!"
"Okay, two piledrivers. Now would you tell me about the damn monster already?"
"Sure. Where to begin..."
***
High above the skies of Tokyo, Japan flies a commercial helicopter giving fly over tours of the city, for a reasonable fee of course. Besides the pilots, nearly everyone in the helicopter seems to be American or European, and most of them have cameras. One man, however, has no camera, and is just looking out the side window enjoying the view.
"And you can see just in the distance there," says one pilot in English, but with a thick, yet understandable, Japanese accent, "is the impressive Tokyo Tower. It stands at 333 metres, or 1093 feet."
"Wow," says one elderly lady to her just as elderly husband. "That's taller than the Eiffel Tower, I think."
"Approximately forty feet taller," the pilot adds.
"Forty three, if you want to be exact," says the man looking out the window. Everyone turns, and he's instantly recognized as none other than Brian Thorn, international superstar. Many of the people smile at him, and he smiles back, making sure to keep his fan base in check.
The old lady stares at him, possibly wishing she were much younger, until finally building up the nerve to speak. "I take it this isn't the first time you've been in Japan."
"Not at all," Thorn replies politely. "I've been here many times, and I often take a trip like this to refresh my area knowledge of the city." Knowing your surroundings can never be too important, and Thorn's perfect memory has proven accurate thus far. "Holy crap!" he exclaimed suddenly, "is that a Hooters!?"
Something suddenly crashes through the plating of the helicopter and pierces the glass in the front of the vehicle. A low whirring sound can be heard, and our hero immediately recognizes the sound of machine-gun fire. He tells everyone to get down, but notices the pilots are both dead. Having no other options it's up to him, and Brian Thorn leaps to the front of the helicopter, taking the controls.
"You sure you don't want me to do that?" the old man asks. "I am a military veteran!"
"I'm sure once upon a time you did the U.S. of A. proud, grandpa, but I can get us through this." That was no fib. Brian Thorn has been doing action movies longer than he has been wrestling, and his research for each part has always been extensive. There is no vehicle he can't pilot, no weapon he can't fire, and no bomb he can't diffuse. Well, that could be an exaggeration, but Thorn certainly wouldn't admit it.
As he manages to right the helicopter he looks around for what could have been firing at him, when he sees something he's never seen before. A machine, humanoid, but quite huge. It's something out of a cartoon, he thinks, as this giant robot flies through the air and combats a terrible creature, the Wombat of Doom!
Truly terrifying, this flying creature looks as thoug it's only mission in life is to destroy. The machine, Thorn realized, was trying to combat it when the helicopter was caught with misfire. Thorn had to get away from these creatures as soon as he could, and aimed for a building with a helicopter pad on it.
However as much as he tried to avoid them, it seemed that they kept fighting closer and closer to our hero and his terrified passengers. However, Brian Thorn would not be the Ultimate Model of Perfection in a Mortal Man if he couldn't get himself out of a scrap like this. Not that he's ever been in a scrap like this.
Finally Thorn managed to land the craft and the people get themselves to relative safety, but the one and only Brian Thorn, a legend among legends, finds himself needing to watch this fight from his vantage point. The Wombat of Doom! fights fiercely against this ginormous robot, flying, biting and clawing at it's enemy. Thorn's eyes go wide as the Wombat unleashes his most devastating attack, the Shrieky Stare of Doom!
Suddenly the enormous machine loses control and starts plummeting to the earth below, it's massive frame and the rules of gravity having no care in the world about buildings constructed by man. Thorn reels as the machine slides into the building he's atop and shakes it so hard that he cannot hold on. He may be the perfect human, but that's a hell of an impact.
To his surprise, Brian Thorn doesn't plummet to his death. Instead he happens to land atop the open hatch of the humanoid robot vehicle. "Hello?" he yells as he hangs on for dear life. To his disappointment there is no answer to his call. Being an excellent climber, Thorn manages to make it to the cockpit and realizes that the pilot is dead, his face contorted from the Wombat of Doom!'s attack.
... no, wait...
"Yeesh!" Thorn wanted to help the man, but knew he was too far gone. The monster's attack had done it's damage. With nobody else in sight Brian Thorn knew what he had to do. In no time he was strapped into the seats and trying to figure out the controls.
CRASH!
"Okay, so that's not up..."
Meanwhile the Wombat of Doom! continued trudging his path of destruction through Tokyo. Nobody knew the origin of the Wombat of Doom! but they quickly knew they needed to avoid it. The beast kicked over a fire hydrant, sending water gushing and spraying all over the street. It then smelled something and focused towards a restaurant. Slowly the beast climbed up, positioning itself to crush the building and take what's in it, when it suddenly absorbed a missile shot to the back.
"Nobody, and I mean NOBODY! crushes a Hooters!" Without warning Brian Thorn was battling the beast, throwing massive robotic punches and kicks and moving away from the fine establishment. Eventually the Wombat of Doom! moved on his own and tried to fly away, but Thorn followed and shot at the beast. The epic battle ended when Thorn, his mech taking heavy damage and his weapons on empty, managed to hit a spin kick to the Wombat of Doom!'s head.
The fans cheered as the mech stood tall, and Thorn opened the hatch so all could see him. The Hooters girls ran out to thank him, and he couldn't help but notice their mostly white shirts getting drenched in the spraying water. Life was good.
***
"Interesting," Thorn's agent said over a video conference call. "I guess this means you'll be tied up in Japan for a while?"
"I've been doing some, uh, soul searching," Thorn said slyly, "and I think I've found somewhere I can fit in for the moment."
Thorn pans over his webcam.
"Now if you don't mind," Thorn said, bringing his face back into the image, "I've had a long day and really need to get to bed."
***
A few days later Brian Thorn would be officially introduced to the prototype mech he piloted, and the team responsible for designing it and keeping it up and running. He'd been told that nobody had the natural ability to fly a mech like he did, and he completely agreed. Japanese defense was interested in paying him to continue to help fight off the evil monsters that were sure to try and destroy the city.
"I'm not surprised I'm the best pilot you've ever seen," Thorn said, "but really, I just randomly fell into the damn thing. You sure you want to keep me?"
"Actually, 94.93 percent of all mech pilots just randomly fall into them," a Japanese statistician announced.
Thorn smiled. "Well then I'll have to be the best random dude falling into a mech ever!
"And your enemies," another tech spoke up, "will be tracked on this screen. We'll be able to locate them and send them to you."
Without warning the screen lit up, indicating that multiple monsters were in the area. Good thing for them the crew had been working night and day on repairs for Thorn's mech, and the man himself was ready to go.
"I guess I'll take the closest blip on the radar, here." Thorn said, eager to go. "What is that?"
"Reports indicate it's... a dragon."
"A dragon, huh?" Thorn flashed his million dollar smile. "Perfect."
That is rare to see here in Japan.
Komoto Bobo is climbing the top rope, but no! Here comes Thorn, who blasts to the top and sends Komoto crashing down with a top rope huricanrana.
Can you believe the athleticism? Brian Thorn jumped from the canvas straight up to Komoto Bobo's shoulders, and Bobo was standing atop the turnbuckle!
Brian Thorn is an amazing athlete but he too took some damage from that move. These fans are going crazy for a match that has to be an instant classic.
"Instant classic? The announcers said that?"
"Shut up or you'll ruin the story."
Both men slow to their feet, Thorn is up first and charges at Bobo with a clothesline. No! Bobo ducks and counters with a backslide! Kickout, and now Thorn has Bobo in a pin! Kickout! Back and forth, how many near falls are we going to see?
This is just a testament to both men's conditioning. This match has been going on for three hours and thirty seven minutes, fatigue set in long ago, and now they're still able to kick out of all of these pin attempts.
We'll have to see who is able to last longer in this predicament.
Komoto Bobo is younger but Brian Thorn has legendary endurance.
"Three and a half hours?"
"What did I tell you about ruining the story?"
"Just seems a bit ridiculous..."
We've seen it all folks, from arm locks to scoop slams, from spinning toe holds to powerbombs, and from snapmares to acrobatic maneuvers from the top rope. Now, after all this time, can either of these men find a way to finish the other off?
They must have reversed each others pin attempts for a solid five minutes there. Technical mastery. I didn't even know that many variations on a pin existed! And how clever of Thorn to break that last attempt with a thumb to the eye?
The crowd is going nuts! I've never seen this many people in attendance, unless you count meetings at small countries, and they're all on their feet screaming at Brian Thorn with unbridled hatred. And now he's mocking them!
Nearly four hours of wrestling and he's still got the presence of mind to piss the crowd off. He truly is the best professional wrestler ever. Period.
But he wasted time! Komoto recovered and is signaling to the fans, who are cheering so loudly we just suffered and earth quake.
No joke, where's the Richter Scale?
Brian Thorn just realized what's going on and turns around, kick to the gut! Komoto is signaling for his finisher, the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam! NO!!!
Holy Crap!
Somehow Thorn managed to reverse the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam!!! Nobody has ever countered the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam!
What's he doing now??
DEAR GOD ALMIGHTY!!! Brian Thorn just nailed Komoto Bobo with a SUPER-Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam from the Top Rope!!! Garbage is piling in the ring as Thorn goes for the cover!
1...
2...
3!!!
Holy bajeebus! These fans are going nuts! Typically fans in Japanese wrestling aren't as vocal or physical, but they REALLY hate Brian Thorn for countering the Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam into a Super-Step-Over-Inverted-Spinning-Toe-Hold-Slam from the Top Rope!
The greatest wrestler to ever exist.
Security has to escort him to the back, look at the pile of trash in the ring. Seriously we're going to need a few dump trucks here.
"I'm supposed to believe that seriously happened?"
"Sure did, and then when I got to the back I stopped pretending I was winded. One of the best matches I've ever been involved in."
"Wow, that's truly amazing, but you know full well this isn't the story I was hoping to hear."
"So you can't believe the story about the wrestling match but you can believe the one about the monster in Tokyo?"
"Think about it, if there's going to be a random monster attack it's going to be in Tokyo. Besides, I got the recap of your match from the internet. It went for thirty two minutes and you lost after taking a piledriver."
"Two piledrivers!"
"Okay, two piledrivers. Now would you tell me about the damn monster already?"
"Sure. Where to begin..."
***
High above the skies of Tokyo, Japan flies a commercial helicopter giving fly over tours of the city, for a reasonable fee of course. Besides the pilots, nearly everyone in the helicopter seems to be American or European, and most of them have cameras. One man, however, has no camera, and is just looking out the side window enjoying the view.
"And you can see just in the distance there," says one pilot in English, but with a thick, yet understandable, Japanese accent, "is the impressive Tokyo Tower. It stands at 333 metres, or 1093 feet."
"Wow," says one elderly lady to her just as elderly husband. "That's taller than the Eiffel Tower, I think."
"Approximately forty feet taller," the pilot adds.
"Forty three, if you want to be exact," says the man looking out the window. Everyone turns, and he's instantly recognized as none other than Brian Thorn, international superstar. Many of the people smile at him, and he smiles back, making sure to keep his fan base in check.
The old lady stares at him, possibly wishing she were much younger, until finally building up the nerve to speak. "I take it this isn't the first time you've been in Japan."
"Not at all," Thorn replies politely. "I've been here many times, and I often take a trip like this to refresh my area knowledge of the city." Knowing your surroundings can never be too important, and Thorn's perfect memory has proven accurate thus far. "Holy crap!" he exclaimed suddenly, "is that a Hooters!?"
Something suddenly crashes through the plating of the helicopter and pierces the glass in the front of the vehicle. A low whirring sound can be heard, and our hero immediately recognizes the sound of machine-gun fire. He tells everyone to get down, but notices the pilots are both dead. Having no other options it's up to him, and Brian Thorn leaps to the front of the helicopter, taking the controls.
"You sure you don't want me to do that?" the old man asks. "I am a military veteran!"
"I'm sure once upon a time you did the U.S. of A. proud, grandpa, but I can get us through this." That was no fib. Brian Thorn has been doing action movies longer than he has been wrestling, and his research for each part has always been extensive. There is no vehicle he can't pilot, no weapon he can't fire, and no bomb he can't diffuse. Well, that could be an exaggeration, but Thorn certainly wouldn't admit it.
As he manages to right the helicopter he looks around for what could have been firing at him, when he sees something he's never seen before. A machine, humanoid, but quite huge. It's something out of a cartoon, he thinks, as this giant robot flies through the air and combats a terrible creature, the Wombat of Doom!
Truly terrifying, this flying creature looks as thoug it's only mission in life is to destroy. The machine, Thorn realized, was trying to combat it when the helicopter was caught with misfire. Thorn had to get away from these creatures as soon as he could, and aimed for a building with a helicopter pad on it.
However as much as he tried to avoid them, it seemed that they kept fighting closer and closer to our hero and his terrified passengers. However, Brian Thorn would not be the Ultimate Model of Perfection in a Mortal Man if he couldn't get himself out of a scrap like this. Not that he's ever been in a scrap like this.
Finally Thorn managed to land the craft and the people get themselves to relative safety, but the one and only Brian Thorn, a legend among legends, finds himself needing to watch this fight from his vantage point. The Wombat of Doom! fights fiercely against this ginormous robot, flying, biting and clawing at it's enemy. Thorn's eyes go wide as the Wombat unleashes his most devastating attack, the Shrieky Stare of Doom!
Suddenly the enormous machine loses control and starts plummeting to the earth below, it's massive frame and the rules of gravity having no care in the world about buildings constructed by man. Thorn reels as the machine slides into the building he's atop and shakes it so hard that he cannot hold on. He may be the perfect human, but that's a hell of an impact.
To his surprise, Brian Thorn doesn't plummet to his death. Instead he happens to land atop the open hatch of the humanoid robot vehicle. "Hello?" he yells as he hangs on for dear life. To his disappointment there is no answer to his call. Being an excellent climber, Thorn manages to make it to the cockpit and realizes that the pilot is dead, his face contorted from the Wombat of Doom!'s attack.
... no, wait...
"Yeesh!" Thorn wanted to help the man, but knew he was too far gone. The monster's attack had done it's damage. With nobody else in sight Brian Thorn knew what he had to do. In no time he was strapped into the seats and trying to figure out the controls.
CRASH!
"Okay, so that's not up..."
Meanwhile the Wombat of Doom! continued trudging his path of destruction through Tokyo. Nobody knew the origin of the Wombat of Doom! but they quickly knew they needed to avoid it. The beast kicked over a fire hydrant, sending water gushing and spraying all over the street. It then smelled something and focused towards a restaurant. Slowly the beast climbed up, positioning itself to crush the building and take what's in it, when it suddenly absorbed a missile shot to the back.
"Nobody, and I mean NOBODY! crushes a Hooters!" Without warning Brian Thorn was battling the beast, throwing massive robotic punches and kicks and moving away from the fine establishment. Eventually the Wombat of Doom! moved on his own and tried to fly away, but Thorn followed and shot at the beast. The epic battle ended when Thorn, his mech taking heavy damage and his weapons on empty, managed to hit a spin kick to the Wombat of Doom!'s head.
The fans cheered as the mech stood tall, and Thorn opened the hatch so all could see him. The Hooters girls ran out to thank him, and he couldn't help but notice their mostly white shirts getting drenched in the spraying water. Life was good.
***
"Interesting," Thorn's agent said over a video conference call. "I guess this means you'll be tied up in Japan for a while?"
"I've been doing some, uh, soul searching," Thorn said slyly, "and I think I've found somewhere I can fit in for the moment."
Thorn pans over his webcam.
"Now if you don't mind," Thorn said, bringing his face back into the image, "I've had a long day and really need to get to bed."
***
A few days later Brian Thorn would be officially introduced to the prototype mech he piloted, and the team responsible for designing it and keeping it up and running. He'd been told that nobody had the natural ability to fly a mech like he did, and he completely agreed. Japanese defense was interested in paying him to continue to help fight off the evil monsters that were sure to try and destroy the city.
"I'm not surprised I'm the best pilot you've ever seen," Thorn said, "but really, I just randomly fell into the damn thing. You sure you want to keep me?"
"Actually, 94.93 percent of all mech pilots just randomly fall into them," a Japanese statistician announced.
Thorn smiled. "Well then I'll have to be the best random dude falling into a mech ever!
"And your enemies," another tech spoke up, "will be tracked on this screen. We'll be able to locate them and send them to you."
Without warning the screen lit up, indicating that multiple monsters were in the area. Good thing for them the crew had been working night and day on repairs for Thorn's mech, and the man himself was ready to go.
"I guess I'll take the closest blip on the radar, here." Thorn said, eager to go. "What is that?"
"Reports indicate it's... a dragon."
"A dragon, huh?" Thorn flashed his million dollar smile. "Perfect."
